Monday, March 16, 2009

8 Ball Questions...not of the cocaine variety

So, as it's often apt to do, hanging out with Lauren this weekend and again today cause we're awesome like that...has prompted some questions...Things that I've often thought of before, but she always brings out the super thinker in me. And well, I figure that if the thoughts are good enough to appear in my head, they might just be good enough to commit to paper (or blogosphere, if you will -- and I will).

We were talking, the good Mich and I, about what we should be doing with our lives...because when we're not talking about gossip girl or high school musical or awesome acapella singers...we like to talk about other "big world issues."

I'm slowly realizing that this blog is becoming a vehicle for top 5's or top 10's or whatever have you, and I think I should just kinda make peace with it...

So, for your enjoyment: The top 5 jobs I would like to have if I could do them right now and money were no object. It is only money, after all.

1) Make up artist/marketing maven for M-A-C Cosmetics: 
- I get to move to Toronto where they are based. CHA-CHING. I've only been trying to get back there since I was a wee tike.
- I get make up and LOTS of it. It's kinda my favorite toy on the planet. Sweet deal.
- I get to work for an amazing company that is both fun, and worthy...they do amazing things with non-profit stuff. Seriously. Viva Glam...check that ish out. It's no joke.

2) Own a B&B...Yes friends, ever since I saw Nights in Rodanthe, I was sold...I want THAT house, and I want it NOW. And if I can't have it, I would settle for running a little place where people would come to escape the mundane and the miserable. Maybe I could throw some party planning in weddings and things of that nature from the confines of my fine establishment...

3) High School English Teacher...scary molding young minds. All your kids are perverts at the drop of a hat, you lose faith in the public school education forum...ok...maybe this one was a bad call.

4) Promotions for bands: Cause dude...getting free tickets is EVER so sick. Plus, name me one person that doesn't love being exposed to music...good or's kinda like pizza if it's live...if everyone loves it, it's this overwhelming outer body experience that you get to share and if you all hate it, you get to throw things at the stage. I freakin LOVE live ish, people.

5) Life coach cause you know that idea of those who can't do, teach? Well, I figure the same thing applies to just about every damn profession. I can't live my life the way that I want maybe, and I can't sustain a relationship for myself but guess what!? I can probably work magic with yours. So, why not give me a try, right? It's kinda like I'm asking you to date me now...not sure how I feel about that...still...

So yeah...I dunno...It all changes with the wind...sorta like the weather in New England, but you know, I'm a fickle girl, what can I say?

Thursday, March 12, 2009

T-time Etiquette (mine AND yours)

So if there's one thing I've learned from living in Boston, it's that the T is not usually my friend.

I used to work at the Prudential Center and I can tell you that coming home from the shopping and economic "hub" (get it) the middle of summer when you're sweltering to begin with and want very little to do with touching anyone, the idea of getting on a cramped train (once it finally shows up that is) is a pretty heinous thought.

Read: I love the Sox but...depraved fans coming to or fro Fenway!? Yipes. Just, yipes.

But I digress, as I'm fairly sure we're all aware: it ain't summer.

So here's my TOP 5 gripes with the T, as of late...

No. 1) Dear Mr. Conductor (or Mrs.): If you see me RUNNING for the train, be a peach: let me on! Dont slam the door in my face and shoot me a look. I'm real sorry u had to be up early to drive this here thing but hey, we all got places to go and people to do. Strike that, reverse it.

No 2) Did your mama teach you nothing? If you see some poor helpless person trying to get on the T with a HUGE suitcase, you can do a few things to better their (and your me, it helps everything go FASTER)
a) you can help them with said suitcase
c) heaven forfend, you could GIVE YOUR SEAT TO SAID PERSON WHO IS LUGGING THE DAMN THING...(karma people, learn it: love it)

No 3) And this is mia culpa here, friends. Turn your headphones down...I know that the train makes lots of noise but honestly, if I'm trying to listen to my music, I don't really want to hear your music too. I value my hearing same as the next person and the louder yours is, the louder I feel compelled to make mine. Thus resulting in a horrible symphony of ick on the train in the morning. (This was especially apparent when I realized that I had forgotten my headphones. Balls)

No 4) If you're reading the newspaper, is it SO HARD to fold that bad boy in half!? Honestly...I'm gonna wind up RIPPING IT going past your huge ass paper...Just fold it in half and read it. You don't need the whole thing open up for everyone elses enjoyment. My eyesight is bad. I can't read it anyway from where you're sitting. The metro is the size that it is for a reason, Wallstreet Journal reader. Act accordingly: take a hint.

No 5) I just want to say publically: I'm really sorry that I watch things that border on inappropriate on the train namely Rescue Me and Nip/Tuck, both which feature real graphic sex scenes and even more graphic operations/violence/burn scenes etc. I'm real sorry. But I don't wave it in front of you for a reason. I keep that ish on the DL. And I would really appreciate if I didn't have to feel you breathing down my neck cause you're straining to see what I'm watching. Perv, if you want to see a sex scene that bad, might I suggest redtube when you get to the office, or better yet, BUY YOURSELF AN IPOD AND LOAD THAT BAD BOY UP. And then notice how CREEPY it is when someone does that nonsense to you. Not to mention, if you're getting semi hard, and you're standing BEHIND ME, I can notice. I have nerve endings. They feel things. Earth to you. So, maybe shift yourself. Or better yet, STOP STARING. Incidently: both of those shows are real awesome, just saying.

Ok...that's all.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

First post!

First post...and oh how epic it is!

I don't have anything super exciting to say, other than, I hope I can commit to maintaining this fairly regularly...
...and that it doesn't result in an epic failure like every single one of the fancy journals that I bought and abandoned from the ages of 8-15 did. Oops.

To think of the money that I spent on pens and journals.
Probably could've funded grad school for myself.